Some days and weeks one finds oneself trying to let HOPE fly! This was one of those weeks! And yet something wants it to stay, perched upon my finger, resting on my shoulder, held to my heart with great desire! Letting hope fly means giving it the possiblity of leaving, and still knowing that hope MUST be set free so that what is hoped can return. Hope is born of the promise of possibility. Somewhere self protection pulls back on letting the feathered thing raise its head and lift its wings to reach for the sky.
But this week I experienced the terrifying possibility that a family could be reunited in honesty and forgiveness and love! It has been so long a time in coming. I want to reach back into the blue sky and take back my dream. Can I really expect anything to change? Will hope crash land on its maiden voyage? Is there enough love or forgiveness or hosesty to really see this thing through?
I do not know!
I cannot tell yet!
It is out of my control now!
There may always be scars. But scars are better than open wounds.
Are the wounds really all that healed yet? Maybe we will need sutures or surgical staples or maybe even a return to the operating room for another Incise and drain!
But this week hope flew! And now I wait. I realize the importance inherent in this thing for all my children and for their children's children.
There is something powerful in breaking generational abuse...the sins of the fathers. But for now the blessings of hope have been released to fly!
That is all I can do. As tears fall....
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